


Never My Love

by Redelta



Category: Sons of Anarchy
Genre: Explicit Sex, F/M, Happy Lowman - Freeform, OC, Smut, Sons Of Anarchy - Freeform, explicit violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-08
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 06:34:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27960005
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Redelta/pseuds/Redelta
Summary: Chibs' god daughter arrived in Charming looking for some work. The last thing she wanted was to meddle with SAMCRO, but when she finds herself in a difficult position with a certain Georgie Caruso, she has no choice but to accept their help. And with that comes the most dangerous member of the Sons of Anarchy, Happy Lowman. ☺
Relationships: Althea Jarry/Chibs Telford, Happy Lowman/Original Female Character(s), Tara Knowles/Jax Teller
Comments: 11
Kudos: 21





	1. Chapter 1

☺ Chapter 1

Walking through the streets of Charming in the middle of the summer with a bundle of papers under the arm proved itself to be harder than Aishlin thought. Pushing open the restaurant’s door with her shoulder, she welcomed the conditioned air that sent shivers on her sweaty skin the moment she passed the entrance.

“Aishlin O’Dowd?” the barmaid asked, throwing a dish towel on her shoulder.

The woman nodded as she made her way to the counter, placing her folder on the marbled surface.

“You’re late. Sorry but I won’t need to see your résumé.”

“Excuse me?” the dark-haired woman asked. “I made all this way from the supermarket, left a résumé there as well, you can’t just-

“Well I hope you’ll be hired there. Have a nice day.” The woman finished before disappearing behind a door.

Aishlin gathered her things and took a second to collect herself. Asking help from her godfather’s club was the last resort, the last thing she would ever do. She had to keep looking for a job. Hard and maybe not her calling, but better than being paid with blood money. Besides, she had no idea if Chibs would even recognize her after all this time; would he believe her if she'd tell him she had travelled all the way from Ireland? 

Walking out of the diner, she started to make her way downtown, hoping to fin another opportunity when a whistle reached her ear.

“Five foot sixty…four?” she heard behind her, her curiosity taking the best of her, forcing her to turn around. 

“Yes… Why’d you ask?”

The man was quite short, blonde, nearly white hair was slicked back on his head, catching the light as he made his way to her.

“Are you looking for work?” he asked and she nodded. “My boss would be interested in meeting you.” he added, placing a cigarette between his teeth.

“What kind of work would that be?” Aishlin asked, smelling something not quite right about this guy.

“Depends on you sweetheart. Are you good with numbers?”

The ‘sweetheart’ had her almost puking on the street, but she contained herself. Numbers? She was more than good at it, so she nodded.

“Okay, hop in my car, I’ll drive you.” 

Aishlin followed the man, holding her folder in one hand, making sure her switchblade was still in her back pocket with the other; an advice from her mother ‘ _keep it close at all times. We are women, we are prays waiting to be hunted. Never be defensless.’_

The journey was short and Aishlin found herself in a warehouse adjoining a large house, surrounded by half naked women and cameras.

“I don’t think this is for me.” She simply stated to the man that had brought her there in the first place.

“What do you mean, sugar?” she heard another man behind her.

This one was taller, round with short hair and a pair of glasses placed on his nose.

“Georgie Caruso, welcome to my studio.” He said, extending his hand to her.

Clutching her folder against her chest, she didn’t let go of it and watched as the man placed his hand back in his pocket.

“Aishlin O’Dowd.” she simply said.

“You seem a bit shy. That’s all right, I guess Charlie got you up to speed?” he asked and started walking around the studio. Aishlin simply followed him.

She was just curious and there was no threat on the horizon. A simple walk around a porn studio and if this job wasn’t about making the books for the company, she’d simply be on her way.

“So, you have the choice, either you serve as a model for one of these babies over there,” he explained, pointing at an impressively realistic sex doll, plastering a frown on Aishlin face. “Or we need an actress for the math teacher and double P.”

The Irish girl shook her head and stared at this Georgie Caruso. She didn’t know much about porn but she was well aware of what a ‘double P” meant.

“There has been a mistake sir.” Aishlin said with disdain before turning on her heels.

“Once you set foot in here, there are no mistake dear.” Caruso said, grabbing her wrist before she could make another move, letting her papers scatter on the ground.

“Let go of me, please.” she firmly said.

But he didn’t. Instead he clenched his fist harder around her bone and forced her to come closer. From the corner of her eyes, she saw the naked ladies leave the room and a feeling of unsettlement made its way to her stomach.

“You don’t know who I am.” she added, keeping her cool and clenching her fists to hide her trembling limbs. “I am a part of the SAMCRO family you idiot.” Aishlin confidently said, but when she saw a wicked smile on his lips, fear rushed through her once more.

“Even better. I have unfinished business with those boys. Charlie! Hold her.” he instructed

The blonde man came up behind her, softly placing a hand on her shoulder keeping his other one busy as she felt the point of a gun on her back. Swallowing thickly, she watched Caruso leave the room, wondering what he would try to do to her. She needed a moment of confusion, a strategy to get out of this without a bullet in her spine.

And as if the Lord had heard her plea, the warehouse doors suddenly opened on four guys wearing cuts and armed to the teeth. When the man behind raised his gun from behind her back, she didn’t wait a second to get a hold onto her switchblade, sticking it in that Charlie’s kidney, making the man snarl in pain. She watched him fall to his knees, a sudden pulse in her heart when she noticed his hand trying to lift the gun to her. Throwing herself on him with all her might, she blocked his elbow with her knee and gripped her knife harder than ever, piercing the man’s throat with the blade.

The world started to spin as blood rushed out of the man’s artery, spilling all over her hands. She was told many times how to kill, the ways to make it quick, the ways to make it last. She had heard it all. But doing it was something else.

“Aishlin?” a familiar voice asked.

Lifting up her eyes, Chibs was cupping her face with gloved hands. She never thought she’d be so happy to see him again. Of course, she loved him but he was her father’s friend, who left the country for America a long time ago. He was a distant memory.

“God damnit lass, what are you doing here?” he asked, and got no answer. “Happy, get her out of here. We’ll catch Caruso.” He added before getting up to his feet.

Her eyes failed to follow her orders. She wanted to watched Chibs before he’d disappear, making sure it was really him and not a trick of the mind. Instead, her dark orbs focused on her stained blade. She didn’t feel any remorse. That man had tricked her into this mess, it clearly wasn’t the first time he did that sort of thing to a woman. In Aishlin’s book, he deserved to die. But the fact that killing was so easy made her stomach turn. Anybody could kill. No one could ever be safe.

Someone brought her up to her feet, taking her out of her stupor, and taking the knife from her hands. She watched as a tall amber skinned man wiped the blood off of the blade on his jeans and handed it back to her. Taking it between her hands, she had heard Chibs’ orders to the man before her and knew he wouldn’t be any threat despite the gun attached to hip and the hard look on his face.

He didn’t say anything, but he indicated her to the door with a shake of the head and escorted her out to the parking lot. Aishlin carefully watched him climb onto a motorcycle and thanked him with a smile when he handed her a helmet. Putting it on as she sat behind him on the bike, she couldn’t help but notice the smell of gunpowder and cedarwood on the man. A strange association but a surprisingly pleasant one, making her forget the past events for a moment.

"Chibs'll meet us at the club house." the man finally said with a husky voice.

Aishlin nodded and held on to his cut as they drove away. 


	2. Chapter 2

Arriving at the club house, Aishlin was served a cold beer and introduced to Clay and Bobby, the ‘prez’ as they called him and the secretary of the club. As she sat on the bar stool, she watched the three men in the corner of the room, speaking lowly to each other.

“Hey darlin’, you Chibs goddaughter?” a feminine voice asked.

Aishlin made the stool whirl to look at her interlocutor. A woman in her mid-forties with shiny locks of brown and blonde falling on her shoulders.

“Yeah, Aishlin O’Dowd.”

“Gemma.” The woman answered, resting her elbow on the counter. “Your driver didn’t scare you too much?” she said, gesturing her head towards Happy, still standing with Clay but Bobby disappeared.

“No.” the Irish said, trying to hide the surprise this question had raised. Happy seemed to be a kind man. Silent and cold, but kind. “Just, gave me a ride and opened a beer for me.” she explained simply.

“Well, you’re family now sweetheart.” Gemma said before walking off.

Aishlin appreciated it, truly. But she had no intent on being a part of the ‘family.’ And speaking of family, Chibs and the others arrived. The entire group disappeared behind double doors within seconds, leaving the woman alone.

“Hey, is Jax here?” another voice asked.

This time, a younger brunette came through the door, a little blonde boy in her arms.

“Jax?” Aishlin asked.

The woman suddenly seemed suspicious, cocking her head to the side.

“Who are you?”

“Chibs goddaughter. Aishlin.” she said once more to the woman. “I just met them.”

The mother relaxed for a bit and got closer to shake her hand. Aishlin gently grabbed her fingers and politely squeezed them before retrieving her hand.

“Tara. Jax’s… old lady.”

Aishlin was about to say the polite thing to say like ‘Nice to meet you’ or ‘looking forward to get to know you’ but the men suddenly came out of the room they had locked themselves into and Tara quickly made her way to blonde man, leaving her with Chibs now seated beside her.

“How are you?” he asked placing a hand on her shoulder.

“I’m fine. Just, wrong place wrong time.” she said, reassuring the Scottish.

“How are Kerriane and Fiona? Where were you when we were in Ireland last year?” he asked successively.

Aishlin softly scoffed at these sudden questions but placed a small smile on her face.

“They’re fine. They miss you but since there’s no Jimmy anymore, they’re fine.” she explained, putting a smile on Chibs’ lips. “And I was at the Cliffs of Moher, scattering my mother’s ashes. Quite cliché but you knew her, she was all about the romantism.” she continued, staring at her beer with only a short gaze at her godfather.

“Last time I saw you, you were stealing your aunt’s pearls from her neck, now over ten years later I find you in a porn studio.” he said with a chuckle.

Aishlin took a moment to explain how she had gotten herself in this situation. How after two months in Charming she desperately needed another job after getting fired from the library. But it was only when it was too late that she realized she shouldn’t have said too much.

“You know, we could use your help around here.” Chibs offered.

“Thank you but, there is a reason that I have been here for two months without contacting you.” Aishlin said harshly.

“Jesus, I don’t know which accent is the worst.” said a man with dark curls. “Aren’t you a bit old to be his goddaughter anyway?” the man asked.

“I was baptized at seventeen. My mother wasn’t a believer. My father loves Chibs as his own son, so…” Aishlin explained before taking a sip of her beer.

“Look, let me put in a good word to Clay, just until you get back to your feet. After that, you can do whatever you’d like. You have some skills we could put to use –

“Chibs, no!” Aishlin raised her voice. “There is a reason why I left Ireland. This IRA shit has gone too far. I’m not leaving a shit storm to dive immediately into another one. I’m sorry. It was nice to see you again.”

Getting up from her stool, she grabbed the few things that belonged in her pocket and made her way to the door.

“I’ll see you around Chibs.” she said as the man forced a smile on his face. “Happy, thanks for the ride.” she added, her eyes lingering more than she would have wanted on that man, who slightly nodded.

It took over an hour to make the way from TM to her house on foot and as her feet started to send pain all along her spine, Aishlin thought about the comfort on the back of Happy’s bike, with the wind blowing through her hair and the reasonable speed making her feel safe and almighty as he dodged the car on their way.

Opening the mailbox, her heart sank within seconds when she received the bills for the end of the month.

“Fuck.” Aishlin whispered to herself.

After entering the small house, she only had two steps to make to reach a puffy armchair, where she let herself fall onto. Massaging her cheeks with her palms, Aishlin gathered her thoughts hoping that the sons had destroyed the evidences of her crime at Caruso’s. She also hoped they had gutted that bastard the minute they found him. But it was out of her hands now, all she could do was get another job and pretend this misadventure never happened. When the Sons would ride into town, parading like peacocks, she would simply look at them like strangers. That was the best thing. Even if her gaze might linger on one of them… _Fuck Aishlin. Get it together_.

The next morning, Aishlin gathered the bills for the months and sat on the small counter that she also used as a dining table with a steaming cup of coffee. She wasn’t a coffee lover, but she needed to save up some money and coffee was the best way to do that. Hungry? Have a cup of these magical beans instead.

With a calculator in hand, she added the rent, the price of water and electricity on the machine and sighed. A thousand seventeen approximately.

“Fuck.” the Irish whispered to herself.

In less than a minute, her résumé and other papers were under her arm and the woman was on her way to downtown Charming. She couldn’t lose hope now. Even if these two months in the United States proved themselves harder than a life of crime in Ireland, she couldn’t back down.

Store after store, bars after bars and other small shops, her feet burned in her boots and her stomach was craving for some food with loud rumbles. Deciding the bakery was her last stop for the day, she sat at a small table, gathering the change in her pocket for a pastry and water.

Spreading her legs under the table to relieve some of the pain and taking a bite in her éclair, the bakery door opened on an all too familiar client.

“You never give up do you?” Aishlin asked her godfather.

“Neither do you. ‘Been looking all over town for you.” He answered, sitting across from her. “Any luck?” he inquired, taking his gloves off.

“Nope.” She answered, finishing her pastry in a few bites.

Chibs intertwined his fingers on the table, leaning in towards her.

“Listen, I’ve talked to Clay. I know what you’re thinking.” he quickly added when he saw her sigh and about to pretest. “He said you can handle the bar in TM. It’s perfectly legal, you’d have a fair wage… And I promise, no dirty work.” the Scott assured. 

Aishlin had to admit, she was out of option here. But she couldn’t go back to her country.

“Chibs…” she sighed. “Am I supposed to walk an hour every day to come to work?”

“We’ll have someone pick you up.” he simply answered. “Hey, what happened to …hum …”

“Flynn.” Aishlin answered. “Why do you ask? We were talking about work.”

“Well, just curious.”

 _Right_. Aishlin thought. Her union with Flynn was a key for her family and their ties to the IRA. She had stopped wearing his ring a long time ago and their divorce had been made in all secrecy to protect them both. Chibs was just trying to see how the land laid.

“We’re not together anymore.” she cut to the chase.

“And Gal –

“Look, I’ll take the job Chibs.” Aishlin cut him off, not dire to talk about that part of her life. “I’ll take it.”

A small, satisfied smile installed itself between the two scars on Chibs’ face as he rose up to his feet.

“Good. Come here.” he said, extending his arms to her.

Aishlin rose as well, wrapping her arms around his waist, grabbing the leather of his cut between her slender fingers and placed her head on his shoulder. His smell of cologne and whiskey invaded her nostrils in an instant, forcing her to take a moment to adjust.

“I love you kid.” Chibs said against her ear.

“What are the good people of Charming going to think? If they hear the big bad biker sayi –

“Alright alright.” he stopped her.

“I love you too.” Aishlin finally said.

“Come on, I’ll give you a ride.”


	3. Chapter 3

For her first day, a named Tig took her to work. She remembered his comments about her accent, even if she held no bad blood. It was quite simple really: open a bottle of whatever whoever wanted, clean the glasses, the counter and the room in general. Have a cigarette break with one of the guys or Gemma Teller Morrow, the club’s matriarch.

The same day after that, and the day after, days that went so fast a week had passed before Aishlin even realized it. Rent was due.

“Gemma?” she knocked on the office door.

“Yes sweetheart.”

Aishlin made her way inside the room before closing the door behind her.

“Look, I’m not gonna beat around the bush. I need an advance.”

Gemma leaned back on her seat; her lips pinched together.

“Okay, how much do you need?”

“Eight hundred should do it.” she said as confident as possible.

“I’ll see what I can do. Come back at the end of the day.”

“Thanks Gemma.”

 _Well, that went smoother than I expected_. She thought as she made her way back to the bar. If she could add those eight hundred to what she already had, she would be able to pay for everything. It would be her first win since she got to America.

“A beer please.” a voice asked from behind her.

Aishlin opened the bottle and placed it in front of the club’s favorite blonde guy. It seemed strange to her to notice that the man’s buzz cut had already grown. Being here for a week felt like a month to her. Learning pretty quickly everyone’s name, getting to know the women that surrounded the club, exchanging jokes with Chucky and quick hugs with Chibs as goodbyes. She felt home in such little time…

“Jax, maybe it’s not my place to ask but… Caruso?” Aishlin inquired.

“He escaped before we got to him.” the VP explained as the Irish’s stomach dropped. “But his time will come, don’t worry.” he added as Aishlin nodded.

“Aishlin?” Clay called. “Come in here.” He instructed from the chapel.

The woman went around the counter to meet the president, finding Chibs seated in the room as well.

“Look, Chibs told me about… Some of your skills. He said you’re good at, well, obtaining things.” he started.

Aishlin gazed at her godfather, whom was already staring at her.

“What is this about?” she asked, adverting her eyes from Chibs to Clay.

Both men exchanged looks before the president rested his back against the table. Chibs had promised to her she wouldn’t have to get involved in club’s business but deep inside of her, she knew at some point she would need to. She had agreed to be a part of the family, and this was the thing she needed to do to stay.

“We need you to get some papers.” Clay explained. “Now, you would have to get in Hale’s office –

“The cop? Isn’t he de –

“No, his brother. We know he’s got some… compromising sponsors. Sort of.”

“People he bribes.” Chibs resumed.

“You want me to get the list of these people.” Aishlin concluded.

Clay nodded, waiting for her answer.

“I need a pick locker. And someone there with me.”

The Irish knew the risks, she knew what corruption was and how it could eat an organization from the inside. She had seen it among her own family years on end. She had a choice to be honest but her only skills were numbers and stealing. In this world, there isn’t much room for honesty.

“You don’t need it, there is a window, about ten feet high, someone can boost you up there.” Clay instructed. “You get those papers; you get out and that’s it. Any preference? For the guy with you?”

“Someone quiet.” Aishlin said before exiting the room and getting back to the bar.

Feeling for the switchblade in her back pocket, she would be ready for tonight. She simply needed a set of dark clothes. She would need to change at TM, she couldn’t afford another round trip before nightfall.

“Gemma!” she called out when she spotted the matriarch crossing the room.

“I was just looking for you.” The woman said, resting her elbow on the counter, handing a paper bag in her other hand. “Look, I could only get five hundred.”

Aishlin grabbed the bag and placed it beside her. It would be fine, but she would have to put aside food for a while if she was to pay with everything she had left.

“It’s fine.” she dismissed. “I huh… need a favor, again.” she started. “Clay wants me to do something for the club, but I’m gonna need dark clothes. Do you think I can borrow something?”

Gemma had a side smile on her face and a twinge mischief in her eyes.

“Well, I have some clothes from when I was younger in the loft, but I’m not sure it’s very much your style sweetheart.” she explained, staring her up and down.

“It’ll have to do.” Aishlin concluded.

Very _very_ tight black jeans paired with a slinky black turtleneck, only with a low cleavage cut out in the fabric and a pair of leather gloves. Indeed, it wasn’t her style, far from the loose flannel and comfortable jeans she was used to wear. The pants felt like a second skin as Aishlin made her way back to the club house, Gemma softly laughing behind her.

The sun was slowly descending in the sky, leaving the parking lot in darkness if not for the streetlight. Aishlin washed the counter for at least the tenth time that day when she got interrupted.

“You ready to go?” a husky voice asked.

Aishlin raised her eyes to see Happy waiting for her, cladded in a thick dark sweatshirt despite the summer’s heat.

“Yeah, I’m ready.”

Happy simply walked out of the club house, Aishlin on his heels as they made their way to his bike. Climbing on the back, she softly grabbed his elbow to get his attention.

“I forgot, you wouldn’t have a mask, or something?” she asked.

The man rose from the seat and pulled out a black bandana from his back pocket and handed it to her.

“Thanks.” Aishlin answered before putting it her own pocket.

They slowly made their way to the city council’s offices, the night air relieving Aishlin’s lungs from the day’s heat. Despite that short respite, she couldn’t help the knot to form in the pit of her stomach as they got closer, digging her nails in Happy’s sweatshirt.

Parked about three hundred feet from the building, Aishlin wrapped the bandana over her nose, covering half her face as Happy pulled on his hood before making their way to the office.

“Okay, come here.” Happy instructed as he placed his hands as a stirrup for Aishlin.

Grabbing his shoulders, the woman pushed her foot in his palms as he hoisted her up to the window, which she quickly grabbed when she felt her balance betraying her as Happy wriggled beneath her.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“Putting you on my shoulders.” He whispered back.

The Irish tried and gently placed her boots on Happy’s shoulders and once she was stable enough, reached for her switchblade. Sliding the blade under the window, she easily pushed the lock and lifted up the sash window.

“Okay, I’m good.” She indicated before pulling on her arms to get inside the office.

Slowly making her way to the desk, Aishlin started her research. Opening drawer after drawer and searching through a large cabinet, none of these papers could lead to Hale’s ‘sponsors’.

“Fuck.”

Of course, someone like Hale wouldn’t leave such papers in plain sight but, he didn’t seem like a very intelligent man either. Bending over by the desk, Aishlin noticed something taped on the wood.

“Classic.” she whispered to herself, before tearing a slim folder from under the table.

Opening it without waiting another second, the first papers contained indeed a list of names in a chart along with series of numbers on the side. The others were just acquisition certificates. Leaving those in the folder that she taped back to the desk and grabbing the ones for Clay, she was about to leave the office when headlight coming from the street caught her attention.

“Fuck!” she whispered. “Fuck, fuck, fuck!”

Almost jumping out the window that she shut behind her, she let herself fall from the wall, Happy softening the landing by grabbing her waist and placing her on solid ground.

“Cops.” he informed. “We need to go.”

“No, no! They’ll hear the bike and follow us.” Aishlin stopped him. “Shit, neighbors must have heard it too.”

Happy looked around when they saw flashlights make a round. He made a step forward, blocking Aishlin against the wall so the cops wouldn’t see any shadows.

“Listen, I distract them and you go the other way. We’ll meet at TM.” Happy instructed.

Aishlin tried to focus as she could only stare at his collarbone with him so close to her. His scent invaded her again and she had to gather her thoughts before saying anything.

“No, they’ll know it’s SAMCRO. I’ll distract th –

“Can’t let you do that.” Happy declared.

Aishlin raised her head as much as she could to look at him in the eyes, she couldn’t help but notice how the streetlights kissed his face nicely, where his hood didn’t cast soft shadows. _Shit_.

“If you get caught, the club is in shit up to the neck. If I get caught, I’m just a woman in desperate need of money.” His almost black eyes dug in hers without letting anything show through. “I’m not going to rat on you guys. Please go.” she added.

He finally nodded. Partly relieved, Aishlin sighed.

“Here, take the papers.” she said, handing him the few sheets.

Happy placed them in his sweatshirt before taking a few steps back, his heat leaving Aishlin had her suddenly shivering. She gazed at him before taking a deep breath and started running by the cops.

“Hey! Hey you, stop!” she heard them call behind her.

As she crossed the street, she was relieved to hear Happy’s bike taking off in the distance. So, she ran. Jumping over curbs and low walls, she hoped she didn’t lose too much stamina over the years. Making her way in the smallest alleys she could, she made sure that the cars couldn’t follow her. She had a good head start on them as she heard at least two of them running far behind. Until she ended up in a cul-de-sac. Adrenaline rushed through her core when the footsteps got closer. She quickly evaluated the situation; the only way out of there was the gutter. Lucky for her, she didn’t weight more than a hundred twenty pounds lately and was pretty agile. Hopping on a dumpster and grabbing the gutter, she started climbing, wrapping her legs around the pipe and pulling as hard as she could on her arms. In a matter of seconds, she was on a garage’s rooftop and started to run again, her lungs starting to give her a hard time. _How do I get down?_ Fortunately, the cops must have had turned around to catch up to her, for she didn’t hear them try to get on the roof.

At the edge of the building, she squatted and jumped on a parked van, her knees giving out on the landing, she fell face flat on the bodywork.

“Agh, shit.” Aishlin muttered.

Getting back up and jumping on the ground before resuming her race, with a bit more difficulties as her knees sent shivers of pain in her legs. Despite that pain, she couldn’t stick around, she had to get back to TM, without the cops on her tail, preferably. When a headlight hit her face, she was about to turn around when a voice called to her.

“Get on!” Happy ordered.

He didn’t have to ask twice. Jumping on the back of the bike, she wrapped her arms around his waist as he drove off in the night.


End file.
